Planning
How to make a guest list
A guest list is a budget document disguised as a name list. Every name has a cost per head, so decide the total first and work backwards.
Start with a number, not names
Divide your catering budget by the cost per guest. That number is your ceiling, and every later decision is a trade against it.
Write the list in tiers
Invite tier by tier. If declines come in, you already know who moves up, and nobody feels like an afterthought.
- Tier 1: people the day makes no sense without
- Tier 2: close friends and family you clearly want there
- Tier 3: wider circle, colleagues, plus-ones
- Tier 4: nice to have if space and budget allow
Decide the plus-one rule once
Pick a rule — partners only, or anyone in a long relationship — and apply it to everyone. Case-by-case decisions are what cause hurt feelings.
Keep one list, not five
Spreadsheets, chat threads and paper notes drift apart within days. Keep the invitation, replies and headcount in one place so the number you quote the venue is the real one.
Frequently asked questions
- How many guests decline on average?
- It varies with travel and season. Many hosts plan for a portion of declines, but never invite beyond capacity assuming they will happen.
- Should I invite colleagues?
- Only if you would spend a weekend with them. Otherwise keep work and celebration separate.
- How do I cut the list without offending?
- Apply a rule instead of judging individuals: no colleagues, no children, or nobody you have not spoken to in two years.
- Can I add guests after sending?
- Yes. With a digital invitation you send the same link to new names at no extra cost.